


Homestuck Highschool Sexcapades

by milkyboy35



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Bisexual John Egbert, Desk Sex, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, F/M, Grandpa Harley (mentioned) - Freeform, Highschool AU, Humanstuck, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Rough Kissing, Semi-Public Sex, Sex, Sloppy Makeouts, Underage Sex, Vaginal Sex, by the power of birth control, fnaf reference, or something, pregnancy isnt real
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 06:08:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29041395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkyboy35/pseuds/milkyboy35
Summary: What if every Homestuck character was in highschool and ALSO extremely horny?Beta kids and trolls are Sophomores, Alpha kids and trolls are Seniors, Midnight Crew, The Felt, and Exiles are staff. Hussie is the principal but this likely never comes up.
Relationships: Jade Harley/Karkat Vantas, John Egbert/Terezi Pyrope
Kudos: 2





	1. So a Virgin and a Blind Girl walk into a closet (Johnrezi)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Terezi’s a ginger btw

Terezi couldn’t keep her hands out of John’s pants. They were both new to the high school, and had become rather quick friends. Quick enough friends that Terezi wanted to suck him off in janitor’s closet. John and Terezi snuck their way in during lunch, and locked themselves inside.

Terezi immediately pressed John against the the wall as they blindly started making out. She was considerably shorter than him, but that couldn’t stop her, as she stood on the ends of her toes for maximum smooches. He pressed his lips back against hers and their glasses clinked together, emphasizing the lack of any personal space. Terezi’s black lipstick smeared slightly on John’s lips. He swung his arms around her neck while she snuck her hands up his back, before she pulled away shortly, catching her breath and peeling off Egbert’s shirt. John took a deep breath before leaning into Terezi again, resuming their passionate makeout. Terezi began rubbing John’s crotch, which had a sizeable bulge. The darkness of the unlit closet cloaked the true length of John’s manhood, not that room brightness made a difference to Terezi.

She unbuckled his belt quickly, and dropped his pants, letting John’s cock hang loose in his boxers. Terezi, one hand on his cock, the other around him, planted kissed along his neck. She moved downwards to kiss his chest, then his stomach, and before long she was on her knees, teasing his cock, hanging hard in his boxers.

“Fuck Terezi...” he gently moaned as she pulled down his boxers, letting her get a hand on his bare shaft. She breathed deeply, the smell of his cock was intoxicating. She could practically taste the blood running through it, making it throb and twitch in her hands.

“JOHN 1F YOU G3T C4UGHT LOS1NG YOUR V1RG1N1TY 1M GONN4 T3LL 3V3RYON3 YOU H4V3 4 M1CROP3N1S. NOW COV3R YOUR MOUTH SO TH3 WHOL3 COUNTY DO3SNT H34R YOU MO4N” Terezi said, before putting the tip on her tongue, tasting his warmth.

John clasped his hand over his mouth, the other on Terezi’s head, and moaned gently as Terezi enveloped his cock with her warm saliva. She bopped her head up and down while her tongue swirled on his member, leaving a trail of translucent drool. “1 W1LL S4Y, YOU 4R3 B1GG3R TH4N 1 3XP3CT3D~” Terezi teased, taking his cock out and continuing to pump her hand on it.

“I th-“ John started, before closing his eyes and covering his mouth again. Terezi suddenly pressed his cock to the back of her throat, his entire member now covered in her warmth. She gagged on it and continued to take it deep in her throat. John grabbed a fistfull of her ginger hair and bucked his hips involuntarily as she took it deep in her mouth. He opened his eyes and could barely handle how she looked so simultaneously sexy and confident with her smugness, and how she looked so cute with her freckles and short hair and silly red glasses.

His cock throbbed harder in her mouth. Her warm breath and wet throat made him nearly burst with intensity. But Terezi quickly withdrew herself from John’s cock, leaving a heavy layer of her saliva coating it. The sudden exposure to cold air caused John to jolt unexpectedly and fell backwards against the wall, before sinking to the floor.

Terezi laughed loudly before covering her own mouth, giggling to herself, her big grin reaching around her hands. 

“What the fuck did you do?!” hissed John aggressively.

“1 G4V3 YOU 4 BLOWJOB DUMMY” whispered Terezi.

“Why did you stop????”

“1 W4NT3D TO S33 HOW B4D YOU N33D3D TH1S” she said, still grinning, licking her lips a little.

“Well good job you proved your little theory, now please don’t leave me like this” he pleaded.

“TH4TS NO W4Y TO 4SK 4 L4DY TO SUCK YOU OFF JOHN! 1F YOU W4NN4 GO W1TH TH3 L1TTL3 B1TCH ROUT3 YOU GOTT4 COMM1T TO 1T.”

“What do yo-“

“B3G M3”

“What? No!” John protested. Terezi grinned at him and started scooting towards the door. “Wait fuck no! Fine fine I’ll beg.”

“YOU B3TT3R M4K3 1T GOOD, OR 3LS3 YOUR3 GONN4 H4V3 TO F1N1SH YOURS3LF”

John gulped. “Please Terezi. I want you to suck my dick.” He cringed at his own words. “I need you um right now and I wo-“

Terezi put a finger in his mouth to shut him up. It worked. “JOHN PL34S3 G3T B3TT3R 4T NOT B31NG SO CR1NG3 WORTHY 4ND 4DOR4BL3 WH1L3 W3 FUCK.” John had a rebuttal, but was quickly lost when he noticed her jeans were absent, and a pair of teal panties were in their place. Terezi lowered herself with John, who quickly sat up tall from his slumped position against the wall. She pressed her lips against his, while lowering herself to rest on his still wet, and still hard cock. John’s hands wrapped around her back, while she had one hand feeling his bare chest, and the other on rubbing his cock.

Terezi spread the crotch of her panties, exposing herself to John’s cock. She planted a kiss on his neck, leaving a black lipstick mark, before sinking down into his heat. She suppressed his moans by slamming their lips together once again. John’s hands made their way down to grip Terezi’s ass while she rode his cock. It throbbed and twitched inside her while she too moaned into their kiss. Terezi’s tongue found its way into John’s mouth, who met it with his own. Her smug grin was replaced by lustful moans, matching his as they grinded against eachother as hard as they could. The pair of teens humped against each other needily, John’s cock thrusting deeper in her wet pussy. 

Terezi’s tongue danced around John’s, while his penis throbbed harder, enveloped by Terezi’s sensitive walls, the sensation of bursting returning. Terezi tightened around his member as she felt every thrust deep inside her. The pair practically melted into each other's arms as they climaxed on the floor. Their breaths were heavy as they wrapped around one another, lips still locked. They clawed at one another, the heightened atmosphere drawing them closer together.

After several minutes of clinging together and heavy breaths, they untangled themselves from one another and sat together in the dark closet. The only light coming in was from under the door, which allowed just enough visibility to see Terezi’s satisfied expression. John sat back up against the wall with Terezi’s head nestled under his head, ginger hair tickling his chest.

“I’m gonna be honest, I don’t feel like doing shit for the rest of my life.”

“W4NN4 SK1P 4ND GO M4K3OUT 1N TH3 B4THROOM FOR TH3 R3ST OF TH3 D4Y? TH3 ON3 ON TH3 2ND FLOOR H4S 4 LOCK ON 1T.”

“Hell yeah.”


	2. Learning about Biology! (Jadekat)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jade and Karkat really learn a lot about Biology today! :)
> 
> Also in case anyone is wondering, Mrs. Queen is the White Queen (or the Windswept Questant)

“WHAT’S UP FUCKWAD” Karkat said, sitting down next to his teacher-assigned lab partner.

“Oh nothing, just missing 5 seconds ago when I didn’t have to look at your ugly face!” She replied.

“OH YEAH WELL I MISS NOT LOOKING AT YOUR UGLY ASS HAIR, ITS STUPIDLY OUT OF CONTROL YOU LOOK LIKE A WILD BEAST”

“I like having my hair like this! Yours is somehow both pointy and slouching at the same time! Just like you!! I’ve never met someone so apathetic and yet so angry at everyone!!!”

“Harley! Vantas!” the teacher cried out. “Please cease your bickering! I promise you two will be seperated after winter break, but for now I need you to hold it together for just two weeks. Ok?”

The whole class now looked at the pair of them. Jade nodded, blushing from embarrassment. Karkat managed to grumble a “FINE.”

“Excellent. Now, you may have heard from your older siblings who have had me in the past, but we always have a partner project at the end of the year. You and your lab partner must make a slideshow presentation on the...” Karkat zoned out, the presentation not capturing his thoughts at all, but the fact he would have to spend time outside of school with Jade, the ugliest, most annoying, most terrible person he’s ever met. He and Jade locked eyes in a heated contest of glares. She must be thinking the same thing, he thought.

“So... do you want to just do half and I do half and that’s that?”

“THAT MIGHT BE THE SMARTEST THING YOU’VE EVER SAID HARLEY.”

“Ugh. Whatever, give me your email and I’ll share it with you on Animoto.”

“WHOA WHOA. ANIMOTO? FUCKING ANIMOTO? REALLY??? GOOGLE SLIDES ARE RIGHT FUCKING THERE AND YOU GO WITH GOD DAMN ANIMOTO”

“Holy shit Karkat we can do google slides! I just like all the funky transitions and themes in Animoto!”

“YOU CAN DO ANIMATIONS IN GOOGLE SLIDES TOO DIPSHIT”

“Well everybody does google slide presentations!”

“THATS BECAUSE THEYRE THE BEST FORM OF SLIDESHOWS”

“They’re boring!!”

“THEY’RE PRACTICAL!!”

“Jade Harley and Karkat Vantas if I have to ask you two to be quiet once more, both of you will be seeing Vice Principal Scratch!”

The two of them exchanged nervous looks. They said no one ever returns from Vice Principal Scratch’s office.

“FFFFFFINE WE CAN DO YOUR STUPIDASS ANIMOTO”

“Really? Yay!” Jade’s mood switched nearly on a dime. Her beaming smile made Karkat’s stomache flip. “Anyways give me your email!!”

“YEAH YEAH. IT’S CARCINOGENETICIST@GMAIL.COM”

“Cool! I’ll work on it some tonight!”

“AWESOME, I GUESS”

***

Some hours later in the early evening, Karkat opened his email to several emails, which he opens the newest one.

GG: UGHHHHHHH my school laptop is dead and I think I left the charger at school :( I think you have the same kind of computer, would you mind if I borrowed your charger tonight? I wanna knock this project out as soon as possible

Karkat quickly replied via text message. CG: YEAH SURE LET ME DROP EVERYTHING IM DOING SO I CAN COME HELP YOU WITH SOME BULLSHIT PROJECT THAT ISNT EVEN DUE FOR LIKE 2 WEEKS I THINK

GG: bluh bluh but i wanna get it done! also we’re supposed to work together so like can you try not being a dickbag for 2 weeks, then you can go back to being a miserable asshole as much as you want

CG: IM GONNA TAKE THIS CHARGER OVER TO YOUR HOUSE SO I CAN STRANGLE YOU WITH IT

GG: :0 yay!!!! thank you <3333333

CG: SHUT UP WITH YOUR <3’s

GG: nope!! <333333333333333333333333

CG: WHATEVER IM COMING OVER

Karkat grumbled to himself about having nothing better to do, and grabbed his laptop and charger, before driving himself to Jade’s house.

Jade’s Grandpa lived in a quite ostentatious mansion, fit for a family of 1 adult, 4 kids and a dog. Jade had a big family tree. Not that Karkat knew or cared about anything related to her. He got out his phone to text her again.

CG: HEY DIPSHIT I’M OUTSIDE

GG: well come inside then!! 83

CG: UGHHHHH BUT ITS COLD

GG: quit your bitching and get in here so we can work together!

Karkat picked up his laptop and charger and headed to the front door. He knocked on the door and was greeted by his lab partner, wearing a t-shirt and short shorts that really brought out her thighs. Karkat’s breath hitched a little, a slight awkwardness spreading throughout his body.

“Wow, the old Vantas cold shoulder? Even after you brought your charger all the way over here?”

Karkat snapped out of his thoughts. “SHUT UP I BROUGHT THE STUPID CHARGER FOR YOUR LAPTOP. CAN I GO HOME NOW?”

“But Karkat!!” Jade whined. “We need to work on this sooner rather than later, and I know you’re not going to come over just because you can anytime soon.”

“DO YOUR HALF OF THE PROJECT WHENEVER YOU WANT HARLEY, BUT IM DOING WHAT I WANT, WHEN I WANT.”

Jade pouted at him and gave him a saddened side-glance. “Guess I have to work all alone then...” she said, turning back inside.

“FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FINE I’LL HELP YOU. JUST STOP MAKING ME FEEL BAD.”

Jade’s somber expression brightened as soon as he said that. “YAY!!!! I’ll take you to my room and we can work there!” she said, grabbing his hand, pulling him inside her home, leading him around to her bedroom. Karkat was hit with the smell of freshly grown mint and faint whiff of lavender. Or something. You don’t know shit about plants. Her room had a large bed, half taken up by a monsterous pile of plushies. She also had a wooden desk with her laptop sitting on it, neither particularly matching the overall room. Jade used Karkat’s cord to plug in her laptop to charge as he set his laptop on the desk as well, the cord stretching across her floor. 

“Thank you!!!” exclaimed Jade loudly, before wrapping her arms around Karkat.

Karkat shrugged her off, blushing. “FUCK HARLEY, ITS OK ITS WHATEVER, JUST DONT DO THAT AGAIN.”

Jade blew a small raspberry, coaxing a groan out of Karkat, before she opened her laptop to their project. She gave him a basic idea of their presentation, showing off some of the pre-made slides and the theme she picked out. She had a certain elegancy and passion as she explained. It was a side of her Karkat wasn’t familiar with. She stopped to catch her breath and run a hand through her hair. “Karkat? You ok?” she asked.

“HUH? OH YEAH OF COURSE I AM. WHY WOULDN’T I BE?” 

“You’re very observant and quiet today. I’m just suprised you’re not getting upset over every idea I throw out.”

“OH SHIT, DO YOU LIKE IT WHEN IM AN ASSHOLE TO YOU?”

“No!!! It’s a nice change of pace!” She smiled at him. 

He opened his mouth to rant on how she deserves his wrath, but instead hushed himself. Jade got back to her explaination while Karkat felt something different inside. Something warm. Like a bunch of warm honey had tangled up all of his major organs causing them to be warm, sweet, and sticky. Did Jade change something about herself?, he wondered. Maybe she cleaned her glasses. Maybe it was a new haircut. Or maybe, just maybe, listening to what she has to say for once actually feels good.

Karkat snapped out of his thoughts and caught the end of Jade's plan. "Basically, I'll do the first 5 slides and you can do the last 4."

"OK. COOL. GOT IT."

"Do you want me to help you get onto the presentation?"

"NO WH-" he paused for a moment. "ACTUALLY YEAH. THAT WOULD BE HELPFUL."

Jade was almost shocked by how much of a not-asshole he was being today. She smilied and sat on the bed, patting for him to sit next to her. He sat down, feeling the softness of her blankets. She grabbed Karkat's laptop and opened his email and got to work, as he watched intently

***

"FUCK NO!! DON'T DO THAT!" Karkat yelled.

"Screw you I'm a bad bitch I do what I want!" Jade replied back, eyes glued to the screen. They sat together on the floor, her in his lap, with his laptop in hers. Karkat held her close while resting his head in her fluffy and copious hair. Jade frantically tapped the mousepad, before a loud screaming sound came from the laptop, with an animation of a screaming anamatronic bunny.

The pair screamed in return and fell backwards onto eachother, the laptop falling harmlessly to the floor. Karkat still had his arms wrapped around her, and Jade had put her arms on top of his. They quickly dissolved into a fit of laughter, Jade rolling out of his hold, and the pair sitting up. Seeing eachothers laughter made their sides hurt even harder. Jade's laughter died down and she leaned against his side, while he put his arm around her. She glanced out the window, seeing nothing but pitch black darkness, penetrated by the large glowing crescent of a moon.

"Fucking hell..." she said. Karkat patted her side in agreement. She leaned up again, looking over at him. For the first time, he looked genuinely happy. Jade smiled brightly, Karkat matching her smile with his own. 

They leaned closer together. Their eyes were locked, jaws a bit slack as their lips parted ever so slightly. Jade could hear Karkat's breathing, his deep and warm desires spilling out into the voice of his breath. Jade put her arms around him and gently pressed her lips against his. The two closed their gaze, calmly kissing as if they had done this 1000 times before. They finally broke their kiss, both closely observing the other's facial expressions. Jade face filled up with her blush, and Karkat met her embrace with his own arms. Their eyes stayed locked as they dove in for another kiss, this one less gentle as Jade pulled her body closer into Karkat's. She sat herself back into his lap, legs wrapped around his waist, as their lips remained locked.

Karkat toyed with her hair in one hand, the other on the back of her head, pushing them closer. Jade intook a deep breath from her nostrils, before breaking their kiss. She wrapped her limbs around him tighter, nestling her head in his neck, planting small kisses. Karkat grabbed Jade's rear, coaxing a sudden gasp, before lifting her up. She held on to him tighter, feeling his pulse pounding. He carried her to the desk, where she slipped her laptop off to the side, making room for herself. Jade planted kisses along his jaw, making her way to his cheek, before their lips danced into a heavy makeout once again. 

However, Jade broke it shortly after it began. She whispered into his ear with a heavy breath, "Close the door."

Karkat's eyes widened, he paused for a moment before grinning and dashing over to the door. He closed it quickly and quietly, not to attract to much attention. He looked over to her and locked it. She nodded with approval and beckoned him to her. He ran over to the desk, arms wrapping around their partner, and their makeout resuming. Jade's hands decended, feeling the softness of his sweater, to lift it up. To Karkat's dismay, their kiss was broken again so that he could lift the sweater over his head. She tossed it onto the floor, where it matched the many other things strewn about the place.

They played the back and forth game of kissing, then breaking said kiss to remove clothes, before resuming the kiss, only to have it broken again. Karkat reached to remove her bra, he sat in just a pair of checkerboard boxers, before he stopped him. "Allow me," she said with a flirtatious wink. She slipped the straps of it over her shoulders, and allowed her breasts to hang free. They weren't the most impressive, especially compared to Roxy or Aradia, but who fucking cares. Certainly not Karkat. He glanced at her, receiving a quick nod, before cupping his hands underneath them. He felt their warmth and malleability, squeezing them gently, flicking her nipples one-handedly. She hummed gently, closing her eyes and enjoying the stimulation. Karkat moved his hands downwards, gripping her hips. Her eyes fluttered open as her panties were removed. She stuck her legs out for him as he pulled them off, and revealed her wetness.

He reached out to feel it, brushing two of his fingers against it gently. She moaned slightly, the sensation was completely changed with third party to help. Karkat rubbed up and down on her gently, before inserting his middle finger. The inside was wet and caved. It twitched, begging for something more. He removed his hand, a thing layer of her residue on his hand, as Jade placed a hand on his boxers. She couldn't remove them from her position, but he got the drift. He pulled them down, revealing his erect manhood to her. Neither had seen the other sex's junk before, but it wasn't a foreign concept. Karkat pressed his cock against her exposed pussy, hands gripping her thighs. Jade curled her lip and pressed her back against the wall, while pushing her hips forward. The head of his penis pushed its way into her, to her delight. She hummed gladly, trying not to draw attention to herself from anyone who may be home. Karkat pushed himself further, making her moan gently against him. His cock was enveloped in her hotness, slickening for more. Karkat pulled himself back and thrusted into her.

"Fuck..." Jade gently whispered, Karkat's cock pressing deeper inside her. He pressed himself to the base of his cock, his balls resting against Jade. He reared back once more, thrusting hard. She moaned hard, before closing her mouth and eyes widening. Karkat placed a hand over her mouth and kept thrusting into her. Her moans were muffled as he slammed into her over and over again. Her grip slackened on his shoulders as he pounded her tight pussy. Her breath quickened as her insides were stimulated by his cock. He groaned as she tightened around him, her hot breath and deep moans on his hands did no favors, making him want to please her even harder. His pace sped up as he pushed himself harder and harder in her, his thighs slapping against her. Jade's hands fell off of Karkat as she slipped forward, his cock pounding deeper inside her than before, her moans escaping his hand.

"Oh fuck don't stop don't stop!!" she moaned, her insides twitching hard against his length. He was close too, he removed his hands to wrap them around her and bring the pair close again. She was lifted up and their lips matched to meet eachother, containing the moans and groans of the other as they twitched and throbbed, ejaculating hard against the other and the desk. Karkat's and Jade's cum swirled together to make a mess as they roughly slammed their bodies together. Their jizz dripped down her body, coating the desk and floor.

The pair looked at one another, infatuated deeply by the other. Neither would've believed years of anger and frustration could've been satisfyed in one night. Maybe it wasn't all resolved, but Karkat and Jade were happy enough, feeling eachother's warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not sponsored by animoto


End file.
